Padma Gillen

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ARTIST STATEMENT

I have been a Buddhist for over ten years now. Painting is an important part of my Buddhist practice - a form of meditation.

It is about being fully present, opening up and listening, and being able to accept what emerges. It is about regarding the canvas as the 'object of meditation' and responding to it appropriately. A balance of will and receptivity, letting go of the chattering mind and letting the work emerge from somewhere deeper, and recognising the painting as a complex of processes, both 'internal' and 'external'.

The paintings I make tend to be abstract, colourful and painted in a physical, spontaneous manner. I paint layer upon layer, building texture and complexity, until the painting looks and feels done. I spend lots of time just looking - sometimes days.

In 2005, at the age of 34, I had a brain haemorrhage and almost died.

Since then I have noticed forms, or intimations of forms, beginning to emerge in the paintings. I seem to be working through what has happened to me through my painting. The paintings I am currently making are about mortality, loss and fear, but also about rebirth, spiritual awakening, and richness in the depths of being.

Before I send a painting out into the world, I do some Buddhist ritual.

I burn some incense, chant some mantras, and dedicate the work I have put into the painting to the benefit of all beings. Then I let it go.

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